Why is it so weird now?

Navigating the experience of coming back together after too much time apart. And blazers. (Plus an exciting book update!)

I’m traveling for work today. It’s the first time in over two years, and I’m nervous.

It feels like a lot to fly across the country and present myself to other humans in a professional capacity. I have had butterflies all week, and my coping mechanism is to over prepare. I spent the last few days brainstorming ideas, scribbling down scenarios, and agonizing over outfits. That last one has proven to be the thorniest issue. I just don’t know what the pandemic has done to business casual. I imagine the suit has evolved out of our lexicon completely and wonder how we are now to present ourselves to strike that perfect balance between effortless and put-together. It won’t surprise me to see people in stylish joggers, and I’m all about it, but it widens the spectrum of possible wardrobe options, which is stressful.    

Am I allowed to cry on this bench?

Beyond the fashion woes is the added complexity of flying six hours in a mask (ew) and needing to get tested before entering this event. It's fine, but those actions carry an energy of having to prove myself worthy of entering the premises. I need to receive the blessing of the PCR gods to gain access to the event I traveled across a continent to attend.

Gimme.

There’s the wrinkle that, in an effort to make my life less complicated, I’ve cut grains, sugar, and coffee from my diet. This trip will be a weeklong foray into feeding myself from a hotel happy hour bistro after becoming wholly accustomed to complete culinary autonomy. Soothingly, there is an In’n’Out burger nearby and I will not hesitate to subsist off protein style double doubles. A girl could do worse!

And there’s the first-day-back jitters of seeing my teammates. Some of them I’ve met before, and it will be a nice little reunion. Others I’ve known for years simply as faces in a box on a Zoom screen. As we come together for the first time, what will we talk about? What is the proper response to that simple inquiry: “How are you?”

How am I?  It’s not a question that’s supposed to be a gotcha, and yet…

---

In other news

I am very happy to share that my book HALF WILD has made its way to LAYOUT. Brilliant geniuses are taking my words and lovingly allocating them to pages which will be printed out by giant machines and distributed across the world someday soon. Approximately ten million thanks to my beautiful pre-readers and proofreaders who came through to help get it across the finish line.

Also, there was already a book (or two) called “Half Wild” out there so I needed to add a subheading. I chose something poetic and pretentious to really make it mine, y’know?

Here it is:

HALF WILD: a prayer for a generation of roaming malcontents

COME ON! 😍

If you haven’t already, please add your name to get updated on the book as we get closer and closer to the release date.